- Make sure they get enough sleep.
Newborns sleep 16-18 hours a day. This obviously decreases as they get older, but surprisingly not by too much. 1 year olds need approximately 14-16 hours a day (including night time, morning and afternoon nap). 2 year olds need right around 14 hours (by now they have dropped that morning naps). 3 year olds need at least 12 hours of sleep a day. By 4 they are starting to drop the afternoon nap. Good rule of thumb about when to put your toddler to bed: take whatever time they woke up in the morning and add 12 hours. They wake up at 7:00am - bedtime should be no later than 7:00pm - starting the bedtime routine at 6:30. Protect these night and nap sleep times and be amazed as your toddler becomes the most fun little person to be with! (This and more great sleep info comes from the book: Healthy Sleep Habits Happy Child by Marc Weissbluth, M.D.)
- Let them graze.
As soon as your little one (or ones - if you're like me) start to walk they want to have nothing to do with that old high chair. More than that, the new finger foods they can start to have are so much fun! So go ahead, put a handful of cheerios down on the coffee table or on a chair in the kitchen and let your little monkey be the cow that they are dying to be. The day I realized that if I kept finger food available for my twin 15 month olds all the time - they became happier. Even now my boys, 6, 6, and 4 still like to "eat and play" as they call it. Eat a little, play a little. As your tot gets older, a fun idea for grazing is filling an ice cube tray with snacks for them to sample: banana slices in one slot, broccoli "trees" in the next, cheerios in the next, grapes, crackers, chopped tomatoes, etc.. My 2 and 3 year olds absolutely loved this.
-Wrestle!
Get up on that bed and roll all over it with them. Pull them back when they start to crawl off and tickle them until they scream. Let them climb all over you. Not only does this help them release lots of toddler energy, but it gives them quality time with you in a fun way, physical touch that they crave, and teaches them how to play rough with out anyone getting hurt.
- Don't expect your toddler to play alone.
Just because "I DO IT!" is their new phrase, doesn't mean they want to do it without you being right there with them. You could fill their bedroom with the coolest toys in the world but if you're in the kitchen, they want to play with the tupperware and the utensils. If you're in the living room, they want those remote controls. Why? The main reason is because they just want to be where you are. So either, spend more time in their play room, or make a special cabinet in the kitchen just for them. (Fill it with tons of fun kitchen items that won't shatter when they get slammed on the floor.)
- Set boundaries and keep them.
As they start to walk and their world becomes bigger, they need to feel like someone (you) is still right there taking care of them. Boundaries provide security for these little entrepreneurs and set the ground work for good discipline for future years. If you say "no touch", mean it. If you say, "stay with me" - watch them with an eagle's eye to make sure they don't wander away. Decide ahead of time what the consequence will be if they touch what you said was a no touch, or if they stray away from you. In our house, touching what Mommy said was a "no touch" meant a smack on the hand (followed by lots of tears, and Mommy saying, "Mommy loves you, I forgive you.") Wandering (or running) away when I said "stay close" meant they had to sit on my hip for an uncomfortable few minutes. When I was teaching them not to go into the street, even a toe into that darkened pavement was a spanking right there and then. (Quickly followed by hugs and kisses and "I forgive you.") Clearly set and kept boundaries help give toddlers the confidence they need to grow and adapt in their new and changing world. (And makes discipline in the next few years a ton easier.)
Top: Me wrestling with my twin tots. March 2005
Bottom: Our kitchen toy cupboard. April 2005
